Cheryl Strayed's Dear Sugar Moves from the Pages to the Stage
An interview with actor, Mick Hilgers from Tiny Beautiful Things at the Mile Square Theatre.
Before Cheryl Strayed became the Cheryl Strayed we know today, she held an unpaid position as an advice columnist for The Rumpus. She drew upon her own life experiences to give advice on how to handle the challenges readers faced—from impossible choices to heartbreaking tragedy to hilarious scenarios—with empathy and encouragement.
Nia Vardalos (yes, that Nia from My Big Fat Greek Wedding) wrote the screenplay. She told W Magazine, “I read the book on a flight from New York to Los Angeles and truly think the entire plane of people could hear my heart smashing against my chest. I had never read anything like Tiny Beautiful Things: The letters, written by real people, are about love, grief, loss, family, and all of life’s conundrums. Sugar’s responses are filled with empathy, forthrightness, and unabashed love.” She secured Cheryl’s permission to write the screenplay, which is now showing at Mile Square Theatre in Hoboken.
I’m honored to have had the opportunity to interview Mick Hilgers, one of the incredibly talented cast members.
What was your initial reaction when you first read Cheryl Strayed's work?
My first encounter with Cheryl Strayed's work was when I saw the Nia Vardalos production of Tiny Beautiful Things at the Public in 2016 or so, directed by Thomas Kail. I had heard of/about Wild but hadn't read the book or seen the movie, and to be honest I knew nothing about Strayed other than "She went on a big hike and faced obstacles, then Reese Witherspoon played her in the film." I was a little bit skeptical: a play about an advice columnist? Featuring a series of letters and responses? Starring the person who wrote the adaptation? But I admire Vardalos and Kail, so I went in expecting an engaging evening and hoping for some laughs. Then when I saw the piece I was immediately taken by the wit, brilliant language, emotional power, and naked honesty of the material. There were some laughs, but the wallop it packed on an emotional level was utterly surprising to me (and the rest of the audience, judging from their reaction). I don't remember too much else about that production (my memory tends to distill into impressions and images over time, which is a very good thing for me as an actor approaching a piece I've seen) beyond the depth of feeling and a few moments from the staging, which was quite different from what we're doing at Mile Square.
How did your perception of Cheryl Strayed evolve as you inhabited this character?
My perception of Strayed started to evolve right away during our table work as we read through the script and began discussing it. I knew she was a skillful writer who packs that emotional punch, and we came to know her as a complicated human who is flawed (plenty flawed) and trying to reach through the many challenges she has faced and continues to face. Other than the brilliant Joi Danielle Price, who plays Sugar (the nom de plume for the advice columnist central character), we all inhabit a variety of characters. We discussed her advice as advice in addition to how it works in the scene and looked at how the levels of trust progress among the characters throughout the show. Strayed gets a lot of credit in my book for painting herself as an imperfect human with contradictions who grows over the course of the play as a writer and a person.
Do you think the themes in Tiny Beautiful Things—like grief, love, and resilience—feel different in today’s world than when the letters were originally published?
Big Idea themes like grief, love, and resilience stretch through time pretty steadfastly, but they can and will hit each person differently depending on what's going on in their world, in both the micro (will I ever get a raise? will this person I'm dating turn out to be my person?) and the macro sense (just how serious is this climate change situation? wait, are we actually participating in the demise of representative democracy as a viable concept?). The play isn't political by any stretch, but it feels like a cry from the heart in today's world.
What has changed is some of the ways we use language and approach certain questions presented by Tiny Beautiful Things. The events of the book and the play take place during the period between the first draft of Wild and its publication, so 1) Strayed was a known quantity but hardly the literary star she has become, and 2) that time period was a while ago: the needle has moved regarding sexuality, gender, abuse, consent, and other potentially fraught topics.
That said, how she frames her responses to some of the questions in the play tells us something about the character of Sugar and the questions themselves. As she confronts them head-on, many people are grappling with their own understanding of the world and the fears that threaten to overwhelm them. In one scene, Sugar mentions the way certain characters "have grown and changed and come to understand things that confounded them before," which is something we are all challenged to do.
This play requires deep emotional vulnerability. How do you take care of yourself after a performance?
Rest, physical and mental. I don't know that I've ever drank so much fresh ginger tea with lemon and honey. I'm drinking a mug of it right now!
Frequently checking in with my fellow company members—this is something our director Kevin R. Free established as a daily practice during rehearsals. While we may not be as methodical about it as we were while getting the play up on its feet, we still share with each other where we are physically and emotionally before and after most shows.
Lots of laughter - in my experience, working on shows with tough content, an extra portion of backstage joking around, and cracking each other up is a frequent result/coping mechanism.
What surprised you most about the experience of performing Tiny Beautiful Things?
I can't tell you because it would be a spoiler. You gotta come see us!
One thing Mick didn’t reference during our interview is that the cast mixes and bakes a batch of actual cookies during the performance. The smell wafts through the theatre, and the audience watches the players eat the cookies later in the play. I’ll be in the audience for the final performance on Sunday, March 23rd, and I have one final question for Mick:
Will you save a cookie for me?
Showtimes for Tiny Beautiful Things at the Mile Square Theatre in Hoboken are listed below:
Mick has extended a special offer to Fly Bravely readers for $15 off the $45 ticket price using the code SUGAR30 at checkout. If you plan to attend the performance, let me know, and I can arrange for you to have a special post-play meet and greet with Mick.
Words of the Week
“You cannot convince people to love you. This is an absolute rule. No one will ever give you love because you want him or her to give it. Real love moves freely in both directions. Don’t waste your time on anything else.” —
in Tiny Beautiful ThingsPhoto of the Week
I was recently invited to the beach in NJ for an intimate and beautifully creatively beautiful evening celebrating my friend,
' 50th birthday. The time we spent together reflected the positive energy she brings to the world through her Uplifters Podcast.During the celebration, Aransas invited us to decorate two items: a shell and a rock. On the shell, we were to write a word that represented what we wanted to attract into our lives. On the rock, we wrote what we wanted to release.
We walked to the beach just before sunset and threw our rocks into the sea. It was satisfying to hear the plunk of our rocks hitting the water and to imagine our words being carried away by the concentric ripples of the ocean. As for my seashell, I admit I cheated. Instead of writing just one word beneath my decoration, I wrote two and decorated each side to reflect my intentions. Sometimes breaking the rules is how we find our way to what matters most.
Thank you Lia. 💕☘️☘️☘️
What a meaningful interview, Lia. And what an extraordinary gift it has been to ring in 50 with you in so many beautiful ways this weekend. Your courage, creativity, and generosity inspire me and make me look forward to this next decade even more enthusiastically in this messy world.